A magnificent job has been done, over the last fifty years, of keeping the lid on the Lev Koverni crisis but the recent declassifying of key documents has shed light on this fascinating story.
It started in the summer of 2013 with a
series of Facebook posts detailing escalating human rights abuses in the
reclusive state. Harrowing photographs of emaciated children accompanied the
posts which went viral, attracting millions of likes and comments. Quite why
atrocities of this sort should be liked so universally went unquestioned at the
time.
Further disturbing images and descriptions
of torture of people hostile to the government of LK leaked out into
cyberspace, in some cases via social media, in others via MMS to journalists at
major news outlets.
The growing weight of evidence of torture
triggered a campaign by major human rights organisations who, based on the
information gathered, launched an international push for coordinated action to
be taken to stop this harm. Donations were gathered, protests organised and
pressure brought to bear on all western, democratic governments.
In the meanwhile, the corporate world had
its own issues to deal with concerning LK. Documents stolen from BP had
appeared on Wikileaks. They detailed preliminary geological surveys suggesting
that oil and natural gas were probably present in significant quantities in the
plains region just outside the capital. Previously considered uneconomic, the
tapping of these reserves was now in consideration due to the steadily rising
international energy prices. BP denied all knowledge of the documents but the
market had other views and BP’s stock gained 10% on the news. Rival companies
started to make circumspect enquiries into how tightly BP had the LK market
locked and what opportunities might exist.
Very little information was available at
this stage. LK was not a member of the UN and the only known consulates,
according to information from the LK Foreign Affairs department, were in
Kazakhstan, Afghanistan and Oman. Attempts to contact the government in LK were
met with silence.
Towards the end of summer, events began to
move very quickly. Almost simultaneously, packages delivered to the Pentagon
and to Thames House exploded in the mail rooms, spreading white powder over a
number of people. Counter-terrorism
measures were activated, crisis committees of senior government officials met
in secret session and analysts scrambled for what information they could get
about these unprecedented attacks.
Six hours after the explosions, video
posted on Al Jazeera’s website claimed responsibility in the name of Shutka, a
violent revolutionary organisation devoted to the overthrow of the LK
government and establishment of a fundamentalist, Sharia state in the region.
Answering Congressional Committee questions following the events, senior
intelligence officials were forced to admit that Shutka had not been on the
radar of their agencies to that point. An Al Qaeda connection was suggested and
further videos, promising more attacks of the same kind, were posted to Al
Jazeera and other sites known to be methods of communication for terrorist
agencies.
A week later, secretive email messages,
sent through a proxy, were received by the White House, the Kremlin and other
major centres of government, begging help on behalf of the democratically
elected Durak of LK. The Shutka had gotten out of hand, the messages read, and
only intervention by the west could ensure ongoing stable, secular government.
Multinational energy companies brought further pressure for intervention to
bear to protect their strategic investments and interests.
The UN Security Council met in emergency
session well into the night and, after lengthy negotiations, agreed to an
urgent peace-keeping mission being sent to the region “to protect democracy and
uphold the government of the Lev Koverni Durak.”
Ten days later, a US carrier battle group,
supported by two British destroyers and five Chinese submarines arrived at the
location of LK’s major harbour, much to the surprise of the three blokes in a
small fishing vessel who were the only ones there. Taken on board the flagship
for interrogation, the three seemed genuinely puzzled as to what was going on
until one of them said, “Bloody Bob and Stan!”
Robert James Holloway (36) and Stanley
Miles Probert (27) were arrested 12 hours later in the IT support section of
the offices of a major Australian accountancy firm. They were found to be in
possession of talcum powder, a number of jacks-in-the-box, map editing software
and a large and long simmering grudge which had arisen from not having been
allowed leave to accompany their colleagues on their month long fishing
vacation.
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