Mindfulness for Parents

Mindfulness - the ancient Buddhist art of being wholly present in and at peace with the moment- is gaining great popularity in the West as a cure for everything from depression, through stress and anxiety to reality TV overdose.

 
Parents, most of all, can benefit from this powerful technique. So here, as a public service from Sound and Fury, is a parent's guide to mindfulness.

First sit yourself somewhere comfortable. Close your eyes and un-tense your shoulders.  Start at the top of your head and relax. Move down to your forehead. Frown slightly. Stand up and remove the small piece of Lego from under your left buttock. Resume your seat.

Let your eyes slowly close. Ignore the little nuisances in the world around you. Ignore the crust of toast sticking out from under the couch. No, I said ignore it. Just let it go. Alright! Stand up, Slowly and deliberately pickup the toast and take it mindfully to the bin - be aware of your every step. Resume your seat.

Become aware of your breathing. In- 2-3-4. Out-2-3-4-5-6. In-2-3-4. Let the strong chemical smell from the laundry drift slowly through your mind. Allow the possibility of unlicensed scientific experimentation, involving bleach on the family cormorant, to pass like a neutrino through your consciousness; interacting with nothing.

Allow your senses to absorb the world around you but don't interact with the thoughts they inspire. Imagine your thoughts flying like birds in through an open window and back out through the opposite window; gone as quickly as they came. Yes, the bird is allowed inside and, no, it won't poo on the new carpet. Do not get up and close the window; it's not letting all the heat out.

Observe impassively as the birds of your thoughts sail gently across the room. Watch them fly but don't try to catch them. Don't engage emotionally with the things that occur to you. There goes the sparrow of washing up. Let it go. Here comes the pigeon of bills to pay. Don't spend tuppence to feed it. There is the raven of lost school shoes, lurking ominously in the skies - observe impassively. There flees the cockatoo that is your youngest closely followed by the eagle older brother, intent on violence.  Ignore the puff of feathers and the the loud squawk.  Detach yourself from the carnage that follows.

Well, OK, if you must, but deal with it organically and hurry back.

You did what to the birds of consciousness?  Someone's going to have to clean that up later, you know?  

 
OK, forget the birds.

Sit again.  Resume your regal pose. Find your centre. Listen to the sounds and rhythms of your body.

Become aware of your heartbeat. Be mindful of its beating - at about 120 bpm, driving your blood pressure to red line. Listen to your breathing which is now coming in ragged pants of the kind you used to enjoy before you realised what all that caused.

Now open your eyes,  turn the TV on, sit your kids in front of it. Go to another room. Pour yourself a large red wine, sit in a comfy chair and let your mind explore the astral plane while you take a siesta. It's the only way.

Please share this with your friends.

Sound and Fury is published each Monday and Thursday afternoon, Australian Eastern Standard Time.